By Nekomata Nuko and Cut. Released in Japan as “Saikyō Death Beam o Uteru Salaryman, Isekai o Yuku” by HJ Bunko. Released in North America by J-Novel Club. Translated by Nolan Good.

“Excuse me, sir? Can I interest you in reviewing a fantastic debut light novel?”

“Aren’t you Aqua from KonoSuba?”

“Don’t be silly, sir, I’m nowhere close to being as well-written as Aqua!”

“…uh-huh. What do you have?”

“This is a new series about a young man who’s accidentally killed by a beautiful young goddess–”

“You?”

“(clearing throat)–and is transported to a new world with fantastic powers!”

“…what makes this different from 80 other books?”

“It has laser beams and beast people!”

“There are many other books with beast people, but I’ll grant you the laser beams. So he basically has a cool gun?”

“Oh no, his lasers can also be a shield, a broomstick so he can fly, they can heal, they can clean…”

“So it’s an “I can do anything I want” power.”

“But with laser beams!”

“And he struggles to get by and goes through character growth?”

“Oh hell no, he’s far too powerful for that! Everything is solved by the laser beams!”

“…and the beast girls?”

“Are totally in love with him, of course! One is plucky and one is tsundere!”

“Two girls.”

“Two girls SO FAR.”

“And he wins them over by…?”

“By being the only person who’s nice to them! And by stroking their ears and tails!”

“Which are erogenous zones, I’m gonna guess.”

“…only the tails?”

“How about slavery?”

“No slavery!… sort of.”

“?”

“OK, the beast people are treated like crap, and it’s legal to kill them, and they’re barely paid anything, and they are worked to death.”

“…so slavery without the actual slavery.”

“Oh, and there’s a bad guy! He’s horrible, a real loathsome person with no redeeming features!”

“Well, we know how much I love those guys.”

“Right?!”

“(stare)”

“(clearing throat) Anyway, you always talk about things you liked, what about it?”

“So we’re assuming that I read this while you were prattling on?”

“Yup!”

“The idea of a man that is so depressed about his current life that, when offered a new life, decides “no thanks”, is interesting…”

“Isn’t it?”

“…that is, until you brainwash him into only thinking of it occasionally because he’s too busy being obsessed with lasers and beast girls.”

“And collecting!”

“And collecting, yes, because apparently the whole book was based on the “pick three random words and write a story about it” meme.”

“Anything else?”

“The identity of the main villain – his actual identity, that is – made me smile for reasons that would spoil it, and his grand plan was grotesquely overblown to such an extent that I was briefly impressed, at least until our hero proved that there’s nothing he can’t defeat with the power of lasers.”

“And?”

“That’s it, really. I ended up being reminded of Rearguard, but Rearguard reveled in its ridiculousness, whereas this is content to merely be a run of the mill OP fantasy.”

“…really, that’s all you got?”

“I guess if pressed, I could say that reading it made me decide to write a review in this format. Will that do?”

“Hrmph. See if I bring you “The Boy Who Ruled the Monsters” in a month!”

“…yeah, I was planning on skipping that anyway.”

“Waaaaaaaaahhh! Kazuma, Sean’s being mean to me!”

“I thought you weren’t Aqua?!?!”