Zero Damage Sword Saint: I Enrolled in a Magic School and Wound Up in a Contract with the Demon Queen, Vol. 3

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By Isle Osaki and kodamazon. Released in Japan as “Kougekiryoku Zero kara Hajimeru Kenseitan: Osananajimi no Oujo ni Suterare Mahou Gakuen ni Nyuugakushitara, Maou to Keiyakusuru Koto ni Natta ” by Overlap Bunko. Released in North America by J-Novel Club. Translated by Stephanie Liu.

The light novels are still ongoing in Japan, but the webnovel this is based on finished last month. The author gave their feelings about all the characters, and for Eugene they wrote, essentially, that they felt a little guilty, given that he was an incredibly cool swordsman who has a loving family and good friends who believe in him, as well as multiple beautiful lovers. The author has a point, this once again falls into the category of “if you like your protagonists to struggle, reading this must feel like acid in your veins”. But I dunno, it’s so unassuming I actually enjoy it more with every book I read. There’s a lack of surprise so far, but that fits – this isn’t slow life, but it’s almost the OP equivalent, and so we see Eugene go home to meet the folks with his new lover, make up with his childhood sweetheart (eventually), and save the world. As a treat.

Eugene is off to his home city, taking along Sumire, who is delighted she gets to ride an airship. Sara is trapped in the land of demon paperwork and will have to arrive later. Erinyes is, of course, still sealed in her “prison”. Sumire has an even easier time than expected, as it turns out Eugene’s dad is from not-Japan, and therefore his favorite foods are things like sukiyaki and bento boxes. Eugene’s father takes him to visit the palace, where he’s made a baron, and he also sees his ex Airi, who keeps trying to speak with him but gets prevented from doing so for some reason. He also goes to visit… no, not his mother’s grave, but a church, where he makes a very startling discovery about his origin and why he has his white healing magic. It’s also a good thing he’s there, as one of the legendary sealed beasts of the kingdom is becoming unsealed, and it’s up to everyone to do something. Even if that means sleeping with more girlfriends.

Like a lot of light novels these days, this has a lot of sex in it without actually being all that sexually explicit. We cut away before the deed is done. That said, the sex is a combination of “we both are really hot for you and have decided that this isn’t happening unless we both do this at the same time” and “sex will help our magic power up and save the world!”. In other words, patently ridiculous, but likely why a lot of folks are reading this. As for Airi, unsurprisingly she’s still in love with Eugene, never dumped him at all (the girl who made the catty remarks ends up getting mojo’d by Eugene to be his spy, in one of the more uncomfortable scenes in the book. Don’t do that), by the end of the book she wants to be one of the lovers as well, but circumstances will likely prevent that for a bit. Other than that… good sword battle, he’s a real sweetie, lookit all the babes.

We’re back to school/dungeon crawling next book, and I do wonder if the polycule (I’ll call it that as Sara and Sumire at least now seem to get along pretty well) adds anyone else or if this is it. If you like male fantasy … fantasy novels, this gives you what you want.

A Tale of the Secret Saint, Vol. 10

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By Touya and chibi. Released in Japan as “Tensei Sita Daiseijyo ha, Seijyo Dearuko Towohitakakusu” by Earth Star Novels. Released in North America by Airship. Translated by Kevin Ishizaka. Adapted by Michelle McGuinness.

I’ve talked before about the series’ biggest draw, which is that Fia is a complete airhead who runs on instinct and misapprehension of everything. The big reveal over the course of these ten books is that it’s not due to her having the memories of someone who lived 300 years ago, but that 300 years ago she was exactly the same – no common sense, head empty. But it’s important to remember the other half of this, because when you have one of those ditzy, strong women protagonists, invariably they amaze everyone around them with their goodness and niceness, and that’s been the case here as well. We meet several new saints, most of whom are either doing the saint gig because they have been forced to, or are trying to use the saint gig to get a good husband. And then they run into Fia, and they’re reminded no, wait. I forgot what I felt when I first gained powers. I forgot that healing people and making them happy is wonderful. That’s Fia’s greatest strength.

We pick up where we left off, with the Evil Queen Hyacinthe being told that Fia will be entering the next Saint Competition. Hyacinthe is against this, but Cerulean is determined to have Fia put Hyacinthe in her place. He does this without bothering to ask Fia, who keeps insisting she’s a knight, and has very good reasons why she does not want to be recognized as the next great saint. (Her backstory of her first death, mentioned in the first book and then quietly dropped, is alluded to here, mostly as to why she’s still viscerally afraid of meeting another demon.) Plus for some reason Fia still can’t really think of Hyacinthe as evil, even after we get backstory of Colette, who is of course sweet as pie and tragically ill. As for the Saint Competition itself… well, that’s where we get back to the funny part of the series.

It is a sign of how desperate everyone is in regards to Colette that they decide the answer is simply to let Fia do her Saint stuff and just tell her to be careful, which is sort of like pulling the pin off a grenade and telling it not to explode. They give Fia a veil to hide herself… except her red hair is immediately recognizable, and in any case she takes it off almost immediately. She realizes that some folks may regard her as Fia the knight, so she decides to skip instead of walk. During the saint ceremony. In front of everyone. She skips. I laughed till I cried. She explains that she’s dropping out as she doesn’t have a lot of mana, but she heals people almost instantly and never feels tired. The only time I was surprised is when she met the guy who lost both legs and didn’t magic them back, and I then realized the only reason she didn’t do that is it’s probably being saved for Book 11. She is an adorable, sweet, all-loving menace to society.

Unfortunately for Fia, I think she is going to attract attention, and that demons will show up again. That said, this is the slowest light novel series out there in terms of dribbling out its plot, so it could be Book 20 by the time that happens. In any case, this is fun.

I Saved Myself with a Potion!: Life in Another World, Vol. 1

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By Akira Iwafune and Sunaho Tobe. Released in Japan as “Potion, Waga Mi o Tasukeru” by Hero Bunko. Released in North America by Hanashi Media. Translated by Harris Hayes.

I sometimes feel guilty that I don’t read more Hanashi Media. Aside from Observation Records of My Fiancee/Wife (now with an anime!), most of their output has basically looked like things I wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole. They had a recent round of licenses, though, and a couple of them jumped out at me, including this one. Slow life! Cute female protagonist! Struggling to get by in a world she knows nothing about! And sure enough, all those things are here. It’s mostly a cute book. It’s content to coast along, and Kaede is something of a female Potato-kun, but it’s nice enough. That said, when I started it I read the table of contents and said “uh oh”. Sure enough, this ends up being another in a long line of “welp, guess I gotta buy a slave” books. Yes, I’m sure she and Kaede will become bestest friends. Yes, Kaede treats her wonderfully. Don’t really care. Stop with the slavery shit.

Kaede wakes up, not on her way to high school as she had been, but in an alley of a fantasy world. She has it easier than some – she can speak and read the language – but she has no money, no food, and no idea how this world works. But she finds a book in her backpack – it tells her how to make potions, and the easiest uses just grass and water. Gradually, using the potions she makes, she gets food, a room and a guild card that gives her ID. She could theoretically make stronger potions, but the ingredients are much harder to find. Then she runs into a party of dragon hunters, who tell her – try to contain your shock – her normal potions work MUCH better than others. What’s more, the way she makes them is unheard of. If she can just survive the massive dragon that landed right in front of her, maybe she’ll become someone really special!

As I said, for the most part this is earnest slow-life stuff. Kaede makes potions, buys things, makes more potions, meets adventurers, takes out a dragon with a one-shot crystal she just powered up that day… you know, the usual. By the end of the book she’s moved to the capital, has made friends with a woman so terrifyingly powerful everyone rushes to obey her (she thinks Kaede is really cute – Kaede suffers from “I’m 17 but look 12” syndrome), she’s got a great cabin in the middle of nowhere, and she’s befriended a fairy. Unfortunately, “make a ton of money selling potions then walk back alone to my remote cabin where I live alone as a young woman” carries dangers that you can probably guess. And guards are expensive and also won’t be live-in guards. Hence: welp, guess I gotta buy a slave. Kaede feels uncomfortable, but is shown that you don’t HAVE to abuse your slave, so treats the 6’5″ gorgeous wolfgirl she buys well. I’m sure they’ll be besties. Nevertheless.

I was sort of hoping to add this to my list of “cute girl does OP things”. It’s 11+ volumes in Japan, so looks popular. But I really try to avoid “welp, guess I gotta buy a slave” books these days, no matter how nice and non-harem the relationship is.