By Kazumi Kamachi and Kiyotaka Haimura. Released in Japan as “Shinyaku To Aru Majutsu no Index” by Dengeki Bunko. Released in North America by Yen On. Translated by Alice Prowse.

I’ve been dealing with a very bad cold the last few days, which might explain some of this, but not all of it: there were a few points in this book I was genuinely laughing out loud. Longtime readers will know that I find Index, much like Strike the Blood, to be rather pathetic when it comes to actual humor, mostly as the humor tends towards the usual shonen harem “whoops I just groped you ha ha” jokes. And indeed, there’s one of those in here too, and it’s not funny. But there is a scene in this book where Mugino is trying to bake something from a cookbook, and the entire scene is just so bizarre and out there I could not stop laughing. It’s the good kind of funny. Likewise, this is the good kind of Index book. Touma runs all over creation, gets everyone mad at him, tries to save a girl, and gets shot in the chest multiple times. OK, that last one is new.

No, that’s not a new character on the cover. You’ve seen Headband Girl before, and if you really want to feel like a nerd, go and look for her page on the Index wiki. Wait, you mean the blond bishie? Yeah, he is new. That’s Thor, looking nothing like Chris Hemsworth. Thor is technically part of GREMLIN, but he’s not very happy with them at the moment after the events of the last two books. As for Touma, he’s dealing with having been away for so long and it being festival time – which means he should be at the school doing prep. Unfortunately for Touma, not only is Ollerus trying to stop and explain the plot and backstory of the entire series to him (Touma is mostly uninterested), but Thor wants to save a girl named Fräulein Kreutune, and gets really pissed off that Touma is no longer a one-dimensional caricature of himself. What’s to be done?

Fräulein Kreutune does indeed look to be the latest girl that needs to be saved, but I’m fairly certain it’s not going to be Touma doing it, especially as she’s befriended Last Order and Fremea. Right now she’s creepy and monotone, I suspect that won’t last. She and Thor are the big new characters, but there’s also a bunch of returning favorites, some of whom I suspected and some of whom are a genuine surprise. I’m fairly positive that whatever is confronting Mugino is NOT the vengeful ghost of Frenda back from the dead, nor do I think Frenda is actually Not Dead After All, so we’ll see what’s up with that next time. The return of Kakine delights me far less, but I’m more worried about the woman telling him to go wild than I am about him personally. As for Touma? Well, he gets himself shot multiple times in the chest as a distraction to confuse the enemy. Which is par for the course.

This is a 2-parter, so we’ll have to wait till the next volume to find out what happens. If you like Index hijinks, this is for you. It even has Mikoto in it! She doesn’t do anything, but hey. And it has Index in it! She doesn’t do anything, but hey.

By Kazumi Kamachi and Kiyotaka Haimura. Released in Japan as “Shinyaku To Aru Majutsu no Index” by Dengeki Bunko. Released in North America by Yen On. Translated by Alice Prowse.

When I reviewed the third volume of New Testament, I said that it was great, after two false stars, to finally have the Index series we remembered back again. Well, guess what, I’m eating my words once more, as this volume features almost none of the main cast, and even Touma, who is technically here, is defined in this book by his absence. And that’s a very deliberate thing. The book this volume reminds me of the most is Vol. 15 of the first Index series, which was a battle royale featuring actual deaths, including people who we (retroactively, after they were fleshed out later) liked.This volume also features a gimmick of pictures of characters that go dark when they’re “killed”, but over the course of the book the lights go on and off on those characters like a pinball. Who’s alive? Who’s dead? It doesn’t matter, because this Index is getting as close as it’s ever gotten to pure horror.

Welcome to Baggage City, located somewhere in Eastern Europe, which is having a fighting tournament that’s bringing all the desperate people with a cool ability and something to prove. Unfortunately for the competitors and all the spectators, this event is being hijacked. Both by GREMLIN, who have planted a few lovely little sociopaths into the event, but also the Kiharas (you may remember Amata Kihara from Book 12-13, where he was turned into a star in the sky by Accelerator). And, yes, Academy City has sent a bunch of soldiers as well, whose sole purpose appears to be providing the “horror” part of the book as one of GREMLIN enjoys doing things like magically changing a guy’s arms to faucets and turning on the taps so blood pours out. There’s also Maria Kumokawa, who we mostly remember as being the maid friend of Tsuchimikado’s maid sister. And there’s Touma… maybe? Boy, there’s not much Touma.

I used to do a breakdown of who the new characters were, as well as where in the timeline this took place. I’ve dropped that, as a) we’re well past the Railgun stories so the timeline is less important (though notably one of the “protagonists” in this book shows up in Railgun years later as an antagonist), and b) it’s hopeless, there’s just too much. Not only are too many characters introduced here, many of whom die before we even get a chance to see who they are, but we also have to deal with the fact that this series is very popular in Japan and not very popular here, so one of the villains we see towards the end, who is introduced as if we know her, turns out to be from one of the Railgun Short Story books. This is actually a pretty strong book, making the point that the reason for all the horror is that Touma is absent from the scene, and the moment he shows up people stop suffering and start getting saved. But unfortunately when Touma arrives there are too many bad guys doing things all at once, two of whom we meet for the first time at that moment, and one of whom, I know from spoiling myself, is VERY important to the whole series going forward. For now, though? Just another bad guy monologuing.

Fortunately, the next two books (yes, it’s a two-parter) seem to get back to more wacky Index shenanigans, possible with actual Index herself. Though I would not count on it. Till then, enjoy the darkness of a world with minimal Touma.

By Kazumi Kamachi and Kiyotaka Haimura. Released in Japan as “Shinyaku To Aru Majutsu no Index” by Dengeki Bunko. Released in North America by Yen On. Translated by Alice Prowse.

The first volume of New Testament did not really feel like the return of the beloved/infamous series, mostly as Touma was entirely absent until the very end of it. The second volume consisted almost entirely of exposition, so also felt like an oddity (sorry, Kaori, I know you tried hard). This one, though, is Index hitting the ground running and announcing that it’s back for good in a full-throated roar. The series has never shied away from action setpieces, of course – that’s its bread and butter – but it’s never felt more like an American action movie than it does in this book. That’s clearly by design, of course – everything’s set up to have the maximum number of explosions and volcano eruptions, everyone gets a chance to show off their cool powers, and even the President of the United States feels more like a movie star than he does an actual President. Unfortunately, Touma ends up figuring out that World War III ending did not, in fact, return everything to normal.

Leivinia Birdway has led a group of all-stars to Hawaii – Touma, Mikoto, Accelerator, Misaka Worst, and Umidori, the villain of the first book, now reduced to mostly being Misaka Worst’s toy, though she gets to be cool near the end, as is traditional with Index books. Unfortunately, from the moment they get to Hawaii, they are caught up in non-stop attacks, explosions, more explosions, terrorists attacks up the wazoo, the aforementioned volcano eruption, and an actual coup by a media mogul who wants to make the United States a theocracy, and also really wants to find her estranged daughter. All of this converges in Hawaii, along with the US president, who has run away from all his handlers as he can’t trust anyone anymore. In fact… can Touma trust anyone anymore?

I mean, probably. Despite her annoyingly evil words to Touma at the end of the book, I doubt that Birdway is really involved with GREMLIN. But it simply works better for her to have Touma in a constant state of righteous fury, and that’s what she gets here, despite the best efforts of Mikoto. Mikoto has, honestly, suffered almost as much as Index (that’s the character, Index, who wears a nun habit, in case everyone had forgotten) since this series began, with whole volumes in a row where she barely does anything. For most of this book, it looks like that may also apply here, given she spends much of this Hawaii trip trying to buy matching promise rings for her and Touma that supposedly tell you if your boyfriend is cheating. Even Misaka Worst points out that she’s been far more relevant than the original Misaka lately. (Every time Misaka Worst mentions the “Third Season”, I roll my eyes.) But Mikoto is pretty much the only one who can try to talk Touma down from the “it’s all my fault, and I alone will shoulder this burden” complex he’s got. I don’t think she succeeds. But she does better than anyone else might have. Touma’s a stubborn nut.

We will be headed back to Academy City next time, but the 4th book isn’t solicited yet. Which is fine, I think we need a small break, this book was exhausting but fun.