Tearmoon Empire, Vol. 12

By Nozomu Mochitsuki and Gilse. Released in Japan as “Tearmoon Teikoku Monogatari” by TO Books. Released in North America by J-Novel Club. Translated by Madeleine Willette.

The cliffhanger ending to the last volume already told us that Bel had returned “from the dead”, so it’s not a surprise to see her on the cover, though it is a bit of a surprise to see her looking older. Mia is also stated to have grown, and for once the narrator, usually snarky, has to assure us that it’s height this time rather than the usual fat jokes. We are told that Mia is now sixteen, which is nice to hear, but also ominous, as it was when Mia turned eighteen that she was captured by the revolution in her first timeline. And it’s probably because we’ve come so far, and are theoretically closer to the end of this series, that Mia is allowing one big secret to come out. Not her own, of course – heaven forbid – although we see some signs in the future that Ludwig may figure it out. But with so many people having seen Bel shot in the neck with an arrow and killed, there’s no other way to explain her return than time travel.

Of course, Mia has bigger problems than just Bel’s resurrection and presence back in the past. Another young girl showed up behind Bel… and Bel has no idea who she is. So presumably not from the “good future”. What’s more, the girl’s name is Patricia… the same as Mia’s grandmother… and she claims to be from a family that Mia can’t quite remember but isn’t around anymore. (It’s hinted she’s suppressing the memory as what happened to the family terrified her.) Mia, who is more on the ball in this book than any other book, is 90% sure that this is her grandmother, somehow sent into the future, the opposite of Bel, but that’s even more terrifying, as it becomes clear that Patricia has been indoctrinated by the Chaos Serpents!

I think the most interesting part of this book is that we see Mia eating a giant pile of sweets throughout, but the narrator rarely chimes in to mention her weight. This is because the sweets help Mia to think and not get distracted, and Mia needs to do a giant pile of thinking in this book. Mia is sixteen, as mentioned earlier, and while still tending towards doing the right thing for the wrong reason, she has learned to not only trust her instincts but anticipate them. She knows she cannot just ignore the Patricia problem and hope it will go away, as (let’s be honest) she did with Bel. And there’s plenty of what we read Tearmoon for, as Mia accidentally comes up with kingdom-altering ideas that will reverberate for decades to come… only it’s getting less accidental. Mia still frames it as being selfish, but she’s not only getting the best results here, she’s getting it because of her words and actions. Her final speech is a fantastic example. It was a terrific lesson. I really love her.

That said, whoops, another nasty cliffhanger. Luckily, Book 13 should be out in late August. Can Mia rescue her own past as well as her own future? And can we still quietly ignore some of the May-December romances in this series? (Looking at you, Citrina.)

The Exiled Noble Rises as the Holy King: Befriending Fluffy Beasts and a Holy Maiden with My Ultimate Cheat Skill!, Vol. 2

By Yu Okano and TAPIOCA. Released in Japan as “Tsuihō Kizoku wa Saikyō Skill “Seiō” de Henkyō kara Nariagaru: Haikyōsha ni Nintei Sareta Ore da kedo Cheat Skill de Mofumofu mo Seijo mo Nakama ni Shichaimashita” by Earth Star Novels. Released in North America by J-Novel Club. Translated by Alex Honton.

Ugh.

…fine, I guess I have to go into more detail. Last time I was unimpressed with the writing and hero but there were enough interesting ideas that I would read a second volume. It became rapidly apparent as I got about 30 pages into this new volume that this was a mistake, as the book writes out its most interesting character and replaces her with another, less interesting blonde who gets to be there in order to give our hero whatever he wants. I decided to drop the book, but flicked to the afterword out of curiosity. There I saw that this was the final volume, something I had not realized. This made me more reluctant to just drop it, since it was almost over anyway, so I soldiered on. This would prove to be my second mistake. Never let it be said I’m not a sucker.

We pick up where we left off, with Aht leaving Noah to go back to the Holy Church and convince them she killed him, then return a year later. In the meantime, he rescues a noblewoman from a group of bandits, and as as reward he and his familiars are taken to their city, which is much better than the one Noah came from. The implication is supposed to be that the noblewoman is into him, but this series has so little interest in romance it just reads as a convenient plot device. He then learns about this city, in great detail, and registers as an adventurer, meaning we get all the stuff with guild cards and stats. Again, in great detail. In the second half of the book, he rids an abandoned town of skeleton warriors, and finds out the skeleton warriors are a plot by an evil cult religion. Then… everything ends so fast you’d think this was a Weekly Shonen Jump action manga.

For the most part this was incredibly boring and irritating. Noah remains a monumentally dull hero, and his tendency to worldbuild in his narration is intensely aggravating. The kobolds, decently developed in the first book, get nothing to do here. The overall plot is wrapped up ludicrously quickly, and the author’s “I meant it to be like that” afterword reads incredibly false given they also say “but the webnovel is ongoing, go read that”. The revelation about Noah’s status of Holy King, and what it really means, is literally “I will now tell you all about this oops I’m dead”. There was one bit that was so bad I actually started to laugh, where Aht (this book’s closest thing to a heroine) arrives back at the church, and the religious leader asks what became of the army of paladins that attacked her, and she says that she killed all of them “as a fun diversion”. The fact that Aht is still pretty sociopathic but now has a new master is absolutely not examined at all, just like the rest of this failure of a series.

Ugh.

Chitose Is in the Ramune Bottle, Vol. 6

By Hiromu and raemz. Released in Japan as “Chitose-kun wa Ramune Bin no Naka” by Gagaga Bunko. Released in North America by Yen On. Translated by Evie Lund.

It does sometimes occur to me that my reviews are, of course, telling you my own opinions, which frequently do not match up with the opinions of other light novel fans. So let’s get this out of the way fast: I really loved this book, and was on the edge of my seat reading it. This is despite the fact that I can easily see about ten different reasons why it would piss off most readers who are not me. First of all, it’s 406 pages of nothing but teenage angst. You had better be ready for people to be sobbing, hating themselves, and talking about how they can never get those cherished days back ever again, everything is RUINED FOREVER. The book consists almost entirely of conversations by high school kids all trying to sound adult, and would be excruciating animated. This is especially true of our cover girl, who is trying her best to be the Tsubasa Hanekawa of this series. As for Chitose, oh my God, you want to punch him. That last one, at least, is deliberate.

We all knew this would be “the Yua book”, and indeed it is, and that’s her on the cover. While everyone else stays with a devastated Yuuka, Yua goes to comfort a broken Chitose, going back to his apartment and making sure that he does things like eat, bathe, sleep, and all the other things he would not do on his own because he wants to wallow in self-hatred. As this happens, we flash back to the start of their first year of high school, when we meet a Yua who is very good at putting on a mask of “normal girl who does not get close to others”, which she rationalizes as not wanting to make trouble for her family. Unfortunately for her, Chitose sees through this immediately, and proceeds to needle her out of that mask every chance he gets. And boy, does she hate him.

Yua’s backstory is very good, and explains a lot about her, but the bulk of the good stuff is in the back half. Chitose gradually starts seeing all his friends (bar Yuuko and Kaito) one by one, and attempts to awkwardly get back to some sort of equilibrium. This is helped by it being summer break. But this isn’t going to work unless he can address the elephant in the room, and Yua (who is MVP here, but I fear is far too similar to Chitose to end up with him by the end of this series) manages to literally blackmail both Chitose and Yuuko to meet up and rip all the bandaids off. Chitose learns that he is not responsible for the romantic feelings of every girl who likes him. Yuuko learns that perhaps kicking everything apart just because she was still being treated like “the best girl” really *was* a dumb idea. And Yua herself is told to try to be a little selfish, and manages to, slightly , succeed.

The upshot of these 400 pages of howling teenage grief and angst is that we’re back to status quo, sort of, except Yuuko has, of course, still confessed. The author says this is the end of the first half of the series, so I assume we have 6 volumes to go…. after the inevitable short story collection, which is what’s coming next. In my top tier of romdrams, but YMMV.