Bottom-Tier Character Tomozaki, Vol. 8

By Yuki Yaku and Fly. Released in Japan as “Jaku Chara Tomozaki-kun” by Gagaga Bunko. Released in North America by Yen On. Translated by Winifred Bird.

If you ever wanted to see someone trip on page 1 and spend the next 276 pages falling to the ground, then have I got a book for you. In all fairness, I should have seen this coming. Everything was going far too smoothly for our boy Tomozaki lately. He’s got friends, he’s got a girlfriend, and he’s even teaching his mentor how to not be some sort of Japanese high school girl cyborg, though signs point to that not really working. But one of those things is a very different beast from the others, and as the book goes on the reader starts to notice how Kikuchi just… isn’t in it. She shows up here and there, she and Tomozaki are cute with each other, but she’s not part of the life he’s trying to live right now, she’s a separate entity. And that leads to everything crashing down for the cliffhanger. So it’s a good thing we’re not gonna have another short-story volume next… hrm? What’s that? Volume 8.5? Ah well We must all suffer.

Things start off well, as our new couple go for a New Year’s shrine visit and run into Izumi and Nakamura, and Tomozaki gets to see what an actual long-time couple who are not worried about doing the wrong thing at all times act like. After that, though, it’s back to assignments – for both our protagonists. Tomozaki has to start working towards his next major goal, which is to be the “head” of a clique of friends. As for Hinami, he takes her to an in-person Atafami meet-up, hoping to show her the fun that can be had in gaming and that it does not have to be as analytical as possible. This meet-up is impactful for him as well; first because he ends up meeting a pro gamer who makes Tomozaki wonder if that’s a future he can do himself; and second, because a college-aged girl named Rena starts hitting on him aggressively… something he does not really handle well at all.

I’m going to be honest here: if your mentor is so emotionally broken that you’re trying to get her to have fun as a goal, why are you trusting her with your romantic thermometer at all? Every time he asked Hinami “is this OK” in regards to Kikuchi’s increasing fragility, I wanted to smack him in the face. She is the LAST person he should be asking. Sigh. But that’s Book 9’s problem, I guess, though if this new romance turns out to be only about 2 weeks long, I fear readers may get annoyed. Other than that, though, Tomozaki does pretty well here. He’s gotten better at asking leading questions without suspicion, and is forcing himself to think about his future in ways that aren’t just “college, I guess” like most of his classmates. I really enjoyed the gaming battle with the pro, not because of the endless pages of Atafami description (again, not a gamer), but because it showed off that there’s a different way of thinking you can access when everything you have is on the line.

Let’s hope Tomozaki accesses that when he tries to rescue his relationship next time. Well, next time after the short stories. Till then, this was painful but excellent.

The Vexations of a Shut-In Vampire Princess, Vol. 1

By Kotei Kobayashi and riichu. Released in Japan as “Hikikomari Kyuuketsuki no Monmon” by GA Bunko. Released in North America by Yen On. Translated by Evie Lund.

As every writer will tell you, it’s much harder to write comedy than it is to write drama. Something that is funny to one person will be boring, annoying, or offensive to four other people. It can be especially difficult when you’re trying to balance out your book, having a lot of funny things in the front half before it gets dark and turns serious. I’ve talked before about Japanese light novel authors in particular being bad at this, singling out the writers of A Certain Magical Index and Strike the Blood for putting in lowbrow harem comedy “whoops I fell into her boobs” moments to lighten up the honestly very well written action and drama in those books. The Vexations of a Shut-In Vampire Princess has comedy that is absolutely dire and painful to read, but it does eventually up the stakes and make things more serious. Unfortunately, that only improves the book very slightly.

Terakomari Gandesblood is the daughter of a renowned family of vampires, so it’s sort of a shame that she’s weak, can’t use magic, is clumsy, and looks younger than she is. Then one day a maid shows up and announces that she’s going to be one of the new Seven Crimson Lords who wage war on behalf of the Empress of their country against the other six countries that surround them. This HORRIFIES Komari, who has barely left her room in the last three years owing to a bullying incident while at school. What’s worse, she’s assigned a company full of perverts, murderers and wastrels, who are famous for mutiny against their new commanders. How on earth is she supposed to deal with this? Can she stop her new maid from being a complete pervert? And why does she have no memory of the incident from three years ago that supposedly started her shut-in days?

Saying what’s wrong with this book will take a while, so let’s dig right in. The first 40% or so is the comedy part, and it’s not funny. Lots of jokes about Komari almost peeing herself (always a bad sign in light novels), the main constantly sexually harasses Komari, the military company are all tenth-generation Irresponsible Captain Tylor rejects, and there is also a guy who raps. Through the entire book. I also dislike the main conceit, which is that they live close to what is essentially a magical resurrection thingummy, so while nearly everyone is brutally murdered in this book, no one actually dies. And once we get Komari’s true backstory and who she really is – and more to the point how it’s covered up – it feels like the villain might be a bit justified in being upset. As for the serious bits, as noted, they’re handled better than the comedy, but they’re also very predictable – the entire final fight had precisely zero surprises.

To sum up: having lesbian maids trying to grope our teenage heroine when she’s trying to go to the bathroom isn’t funny, light novel authors. Thank you.

Hazure Skill: The Guild Member with a Worthless Skill Is Actually a Legendary Assassin, Vol. 1

By Kennoji and KWKM. Released in Japan as “Hazure Skill “Kage ga Usui” o Motsu Guild Shokuin ga, Jitsuha Densetsu no Ansatsusha” by Kadokawa Books. Released in North America by Yen On. Translated by Jan Mitsuko Cash.

This is the fourth of the books that I never read when they initially came out where I had a Twitter poll to see which I should read. It came last. I can see why. That said… all the other books, after finishing them, I was immediately left with a sense of “I don’t want to read any more of this series”. The World of Otome Games Is Tough for Mobs has a protagonist I really hate, Apocalypse Bringer Mynoghra is in a genre I try to avoid, and Min-Maxing My TRPG Build in Another World was so boring I didn’t even do a review. This one, though… if I get another gap in my reading schedule, I might try the next one. It’s in the genre of what I call “McDonald’s” books, i.e. big dumb fun. More to the point, it’s filled with fantasy light novel cliches but mostly avoids the bad ones. Note the mostly.

Roland is part of the party that has been sent to defeat the demon lord. His talent, being unobtrusive, was thought to be completely worthless but makes him a fantastic assassin. He ends up defeating the demon lord himself, though he lets the rest of the party take the credit. Now what he really wants is to retire from his assassin work and live a normal life. The trouble is he has absolutely no idea what normal is. AT ALL. He ends up in a town with an adventurer’s guild, and decides to join… as a guild receptionist. Naturally, as the book goes on everyone else in the cast realizes that he’s far more than he seems. Also, isn’t the demon lord supposed to be dead? Who’s that hot girl who’s hanging out at his house?

I was not kidding when I said this was Big Dumb Fun. It reads like one of those fanfics where the author makes the main character able to do literally anything and have any woman he wants. Unlike a lot of light novels, Roland screws his way through a lot of this book, bedding not only the former demon lord but also the head of the guild and even a passing adventurer. Also, despite his “useless skill”, he’s had so much training that he can literally do almost anything. The reason this is not absolutely unreadable is that Roland is, at heart, a nice person… but he does not ACT like one, as a majority of the OP light novel potatoes do. Roland is brusque and rude, and really does have no idea what normal is, but he not only is incredibly powerful, but he’s good at teaching other people how to maximize THEIR useless skills to become more powerful. This was probably my favorite part of the book, where we see him pinpoint exactly how an adventurer can best be utilized.

So yeah, not going to immediately pick up the next book in this series, but if I get another lull in my reading, I might try the second volume. Which I guess makes it the winner of my poll, even though it came in last.